Report: Car Wash Named Splash

According to residents, a new car wash in Madison, Wisconsin has expertly been named “Splash.”

“We thought of the name when we realized what type of sound water makes when being dumped onto a car,” said car wash founder Rafael Stewart. “We think it’s the best name that fully captures the essence of a regular vehicle going through our state-of-the-art hoses and sponges.”

“It just came to us,” continued Stewart, oblivious that 98% of all car washes on earth are also named Splash.

Preliminary data shows that the most common sound to hear when washing a car is indeed “splash.” After being the first ones on earth to ever realize this, the Splash development team knew that it would be the perfect name for its new business.

“When I was driving to work the other day, I immediately knew the new structure I was driving past was a car wash,” said Madison local Matt Sullivan. “I couldn’t stop thinking about it all day. Splash — it put the image right in my head. What a great name.”

Marketing experts have praised the choice of name, recognizing it as a title that truly evokes the spirit of washing a car.

At press time, a New York based pizzeria had expertly decided to name itself “Mario’s Pizzeria.”

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