NEWS

Lobster Finishing Undergrad Excited To Begin Claw School

After graduating from Atlantis University, area lobster Larry Hardshell is excited to begin three years of Claw School.

“As a pre-claw student at Atlantis, I found the work hard but rewarding,” said the studious crustacean. “I’m excited to continue my studies at the University of Fishigan, where I’m motivated to become a seagal practitioner!”

Hardshell has announced that he eventually wants to become a bubblic defender.

“I want to be a saltwater attorney because of the injustices I see in our seagal system,” said Hardshell. “I’m going to devote my life to defending the rights of blue lobsters.”

While studying at Atlantis, Hardshell earned a 3.9 SEA-PA. Although claw classes are notoriously hard at the University of Fishigan, Hardshell is determined to rise to be in the top 10% of his pod.

“Larry has always cared about eclawlity,” said Linda Hardshell, Larry’s mother. “He’s truly going to make our ecosystem a better place.”

Hardshell was last seen reading a case about an innocent crayfish who had his claws bound before being put in a tank at an American fast-casual restaurant.

Related posts

Audiobook Out Of Stock

The Whole Wheat Post

Dole Releases New Green Spinach To Celebrate St. Patrick’s Day

The Whole Wheat Post

Aquafina Releases New Refreshing 100% Pure Backwash

The Whole Wheat Post