FITNESS

Realistic: This Woman’s New Year’s Resolution Is Going To The Gym The First Week Of January And Then Never Going Back

Most long-term New Year’s resolutions are destined to fail, so why even try? That’s why Paula Greenberg, a 26-year-old Manhattan resident, is vowing not to set herself up for failure this new year.

That’s right: Paula’s resolution is to work out for the first week of 2021 and then steer clear from any fitness centers for the rest of the year. If you’re someone who has trouble following through, this sounds like the perfect compromise that’ll have you feeling fit for seven days and then like the lazy slob you are for the remaining 358!

Last year, Paula crashed and burned after vowing to cut deep-fried foods out of her diet. Embarrassing! But in 2021, she’s turning over a new leaf and setting a goal for herself that’s practically impossible to screw up.

All Paula has to do is drag herself onto the treadmill for seven grueling days, and then she’s off scot-free for the rest of the year. It’s the best of both worlds: she’ll have fulfilled her New Year’s resolution, and she can go back to behaving like the disgusting couch potato that she is!

Good on you, Paula! It’s important to set attainable goals, while also being able to stay true to who you really are: an indolent slug who isn’t even capable of motivating herself until February.

Just a fair warning: sometimes seven sessions on the treadmill can feel like an entire year!

Related posts

Move Over, Goat Yoga: LA Fitness Has Released A Herd Of Cattle Onto The Gym Floor

The Whole Wheat Post

Thank God: The Turkey Trot Is Cancelled This Year

The Whole Wheat Post

Safety First: Peloton Just Released A New $300 Helmet

The Whole Wheat Post