WELLNESS

This 1-Hour Meditation Will Waste An Entire 60 Minutes Of Your Day

Looking for a relaxing meditation that’ll steal a full hour from whatever else you had to do today? Look no further! Headspace’s latest guided meditation drags on for a full 60 minutes!

An entire hour of meditation is the perfect way to escape from the stressors of everyday life and realign yourself with your priorities. After finishing the session, you’ll feel refreshed, followed by a wave of horror when you realize you just sat there and did nothing for the past hour.

Instead of only wasting 10 or 15 minutes, this meditation bravely offers participants the opportunity to abandon their responsibilities for an entire twenty-fourth of the day.

The guide’s soothing voice will allow you to rebalance your chakras, while losing all organizational grasp on your everyday life, since you had so much to do today and instead spent it listening to some stranger’s voice through an app.

The new meditation will be a relaxing distraction from the fact that you could be taking real, tangible steps to improve your life — but instead you’re cross-legged on the floor like some hippie dippie granola freak.

Relax your muscles, breathe, and close your eyes; that way, you can imagine you’re sitting on a tranquil beach with the waves lapping at your toes, instead of being surrounded by scattered stacks of paper, dirty clothes all over the floor, and a colony of ants that’s begun to feast on the half-eaten sandwich you left lying out.

Why procrastinate when you can meditate?

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