What Do You Mean We Weren’t Supposed To Wash Our Vaccine Card

Wait, are you serious? Why didn’t anybody tell us this!

We literally just turned on the dishwasher seconds ago, set to high heat to kill all the bacteria and virus germs on the card’s surface. Now everyone’s saying soap and water could rinse away the ink, or wear away the paper, rendering the card completely useless. 

What next, they’re gonna say we can’t wash our arm after the vaccine because it will rinse away the mRNA from the injection site? 

If it’s so important that we don’t wash this thing, couldn’t that have said that somewhere? Like, written on the actual card? How were we supposed to know that, immediately after showing the card to the person at the vaccine clinic, we shouldn’t have doused that thing in 99% alcohol and left it in warm sudsy water to soak overnight. 

We knew this card was precious and something we needed to hang onto forever and ever. That’s exactly why we made the decision to dry clean the damn thing. Otherwise, we wouldn’t care if it got dirty. Now people are saying we’ll have to go get a new vaccine card. As if that’s even possible! Now it’s like we never even got vaccinated at all. 

Great, just great. Next thing you know, they’ll be saying we’re not supposed to laminate our vaccine card either.

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