NEWS

Subway Clarifies Tuna Sandwich Means Sandwich Intended To Be Eaten By Tunas

Following lab evidence showing that Subway tuna contains no actual tuna, the fast food franchise is clarifying that tuna sandwiches were never supposed to contain tuna in the first place.

“This was all just a big misunderstanding,” said Subway CEO John Chidsey. “By ‘tuna sandwich,’ we meant sandwiches that are intended to be eaten by tunas. A tuna sandwich is a sandwich for tuna, not a sandwich made from tuna.”

“We thought this was clear, but we’re happy that we can now all be on the same page about our delicious sandwiches which are enjoyed by tunas everywhere.”

Subway social media pages have already started doing damage control, encouraging followers to buy Subway tuna sandwiches and feed them to any tunas that might live in their area.

Despite Subway’s clarification, the company is still refusing to reveal what the tuna is really made of.

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