NEWS

Jeff Bezos And Bill Gates Announce Engagement

Following the recent reports of both Jeff Bezos’ and Bill Gates’ divorces, the two billionaires have announced their subsequent engagement to each other.

The couple announced the news at a press conference this past Thursday, explaining that both of their divorces were caused by the billionaires’ undeniable love and attraction.

“After all this time, I’ve realized that I need a life partner who shares my drive, business acumen, and ability to create one of the most successful corporations in human history,” said Microsoft Co-Founder Bill Gates. “And there’s no one who embodies those qualities more than fellow billionaire and love of my life Jeffrey Preston Bezos.”

Press conference footage shows Bezos blushing and then softly kissing his husband-to-be on the cheek.

“I tried ignoring it at first, but I’d been worried for a few years,” said MacKenzie Scott (formerly MacKenzie Bezos). “Jeffrey always assured me that the calls he made at three in the morning each night were for work, but it must have been Bill all along.”

With a combined net worth of over 300 billion dollars, Bezos’ and Gates’ wedding is expected to be an impressive affair.

Following Bezos’ announcement that he will be a passenger on his company’s first upcoming space flight, prospective wedding guests are concerned that the couple could be hosting a destination wedding.

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