How To Roast Vegetables
Spinach: Looks good but shrivels down to absolutely nothing Onion: Can’t even look at this one without crying Tomato: This one’s a complete fruit Broccoli:...
NUTRITION
‘Tomato Fruit,’ Points Out Expert Botanist
According to area man Caleb Fuentes, who is apparently an expert botanist now, tomato fruit. “Tomato fruit,” reported the genius Fuentes, bestowing upon us sweet,...
Vegan Shoes Not Even Edible
New reports are claiming that Veja shoes, an allegedly “vegan” shoe, is not even edible. “Why would they brand themselves as vegan if you can’t...
Snacks Rationed For Whole Day Eaten In 2 Minutes
Reports coming from New York City are claiming that Michael O’Dowd, despite trying to save them for throughout the day, has devoured all four of...
Skippy Debuts New ‘Natural’ Peanut Butter Made Without Brand’s Signature Tapeworm Extract
Skippy has announced that its new “Natural” peanut butter will not contain tapeworm extract, an ingredient that has been a brand staple ever since its...
Reduced Guilt Cookies Still Have Most Of The Guilt
Nutrition scientists at Cornell University have released a report suggesting that most brands of “reduced guilt” cookies still retain a vast majority of the guilt....
Foolproof Technique: Wear A Mask Inside Your Own House To Stop Yourself From Eating
While it’s become clear that we should all be wearing a mask or face covering in public spaces, few people are wearing masks in the...