Entire Hike Spent Thinking About End Of Hike

Recent reports show that area man Bradley Saunders spent an entire three-hour hike thinking about the end of the hike.

The hike, which took place in Washington D.C.’s Rock Creek Park, was supposed to be an enjoyable activity for Saunders and his girlfriend of four months. But instead of focusing on bonding with his new partner, Saunders spent every last minute fantasizing about getting back to the car and driving to his apartment.

“It’s so nice out today,” said Madison Duncan, as her boyfriend estimated that, based on the distance they’d traveled so far, there couldn’t be more than one hour left. “It was such a great day to spend outdoors.”

While the couple encountered herds of deer, stunning brooks, and picturesque ponds, Saunders was preoccupied with what he would order from McDonald’s on the drive home.

“Thanks for doing this hike with me,” said Saunders, making a mental note never to suggest hiking ever again. “It’s such a great way to see nature you never knew existed in your own city.”

When the hike finally did end, Duncan watched her boyfriend run to the car as if greeting a long lost relative, followed by a significant boost in his mood.

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